"Flight" Instructor ~ Anne Pillsbury

Anne and her family

I wouldn’t be writing this blog if it weren’t for my friend and coach, Anne Pillsbury.  Not only did she push me to jump start my own re-invention, but she continually inspires me by practicing what she preaches.  Just last year, Anne was one of those crazy-busy full-time moms, with four kids ranging from a rambunctious two-year-old to a hormonally challenged pre-teen daughter.   The fact that Anne never once complained, combined with her always-perfect coif, led her unkempt, whining friends to believe she was blissfully content with the status quo.  Then, out of the blue, she announced her intention to become a life coach, enrolled in a program, started her own business--and currently counsels a roster of regular clients.  Turns out, Anne had long had a nagging sense of unfulfilled purpose despite the “fullness” of her life.  But, unlike many, Anne actually listened to that little voice, made the leap, and DID something about it.  The results have been life-changing, for her and the women she coaches.  Here are the details of her “flight plan” and slightly bumpy takeoff. . .

First of all, what exactly is a life coach?
A life coach helps you connect to your core values, aspirations, and natural gifts, and motivates you to use them to create positive change in your life.  Often women are feeling stuck, or are looking for something more in their lives, but they don’t know why, or how, or what to do to make the change.  That’s a key component of coaching—as a client you have to be healthy and ready to make a change.  Unlike most forms of therapy, coaching is not about looking back, but moving forward.  A good coach helps you recognize the potential and the power that you already have in you, and helps you learn to listen to and trust your own intuition, wisdom, and talents to keep that forward momentum going.  It’s nurturing and fire-lighting at the same time.

So what sparked this whole endeavor?
It was a combination of things: worries about finances; wanting to contribute; realizing that [my son] Henry would be starting pre-school, and just feeling kind of stuck.  I had been to a life coach years ago [before Henry came along] and really enjoyed the whole process.  Plus, I’ve always been drawn to books about women and their personal journeys.  So here I was, sitting on the beach in Santa Barbara, watching the sunset (like one of those books!), when the idea of being a life coach hit me and just grabbed a hold of me.  I know it sounds a little wacky, but it felt like something greater than me, and I just knew I had to do something with it.  It took on a whole energy of its own—I couldn’t wait to start researching it, and I couldn't sleep because my brain was going a million miles an hour. . .

How did you even know where to start?
Believe it or not, I just started Googling!  I knew the first step was to find a program for me to get certified.  I also knew, from talking to my old coach, that these courses weren’t cheap, so it had to be something local.  Plus, with four kids, I couldn’t exactly fly off for training every week.  So that was pretty much my primary criteria for the search, and right away this one program popped up.  Not only was it a 20-minute drive from my house, but the all reviews were consistently amazing, and from people who flew in from all over the country to go there.  Plus, there was just something about it—and I always tell my clients to listen to their instincts!  The program involved a couple of three-day weekends, and webinars every few months for a year, which seemed reasonable, time-wise.  Then I kind of freaked out--what if I were investing all this money and time and I didn’t end up seeing it through?  I had to tell myself, if nothing else, that coach training would be good for my personal development and could help me get out of the rut I’d been in.

How did your family and friends react?
I was nervous about telling [my husband] Jeff because I knew that once I started talking about it, it became REAL.  It’s one thing to dream on the beach, but being back in my crazy house I started to feel less certain about the whole thing.  I was worried that if Jeff wasn’t all for it, I would take that as a sign that maybe I shouldn’t be doing this.  Luckily, he was completely supportive—he knows me so well, and saw how genuinely excited I was.  Once I got up the nerve to tell him, it was easier to start telling other people.  I was scared about that too—my friends are a smart, opinionated group, and I think all of us have insecurities about being judged.  What was amazing was that pretty much everyone I told had the same reaction—that I was meant to do this!  It was a good exercise for me as a coach, to allow myself to be vulnerable—and I lived through it!  I felt like the universe was supporting me, because everything was falling into place.

What was the training like?
Amazing—after the first ten minutes of the very first session, I knew I was doing exactly what I was supposed to be doing—it just felt right.   Right away I got to experience one of the best parts of coaching, something that helps me with all aspects of my life: the practice of letting go of all of my own stuff and just being there, being of value to someone else.  The point of coach training is to teach you to listen with your heart, and not over-think, because that’s distracting to you and your client.  It was so cool to see those “aha!” moments happening for all of the other students too.  That whole process made it a really non-competitive environment, which was extremely unusual for me!     

How did you get your business up and running?

I knew the first thing I needed to do was set up a web site, and between all the birthday party invitations and teacher appreciation flyers I'd done, I figured it would be no problem. I went on to www.web.com and got the site up in a couple of hours. The problem was with the design. If I was going to be telling women how to channel their inner creativity and power, I needed to have a site that embodied those things, and I sucked at it! That was hard, because everything had been going so smoothly, and here was the first major stumbling block. I didn’t have the thousands of dollars I had heard it cost to use a professional designer, and I was getting really depressed. But, once again, fate stepped in: at one of my seminars I met a woman who gave me her card, which was really well done.  She told me she had stumbled upon an artist at a Seattle street fair of all places, who was launching a graphic design business, and I got her number. This designer got my vision completely, and ended up creating a beautiful site in about a week, and for a fraction of the cost of more established designers. She also did business cards and some promotional post cards for me. It was worth every penny, and I loved supporting another woman entrepreneur! [Note: After seeing Anne’s site, I hired her designer to do my on-line portfolio, which you’ll see in my profile on her coming soon!]

What about marketing yourself?So far, Facebook has been my best resource.  I posted an announcement on my page, and my friends have been great about promoting it on theirs.  Women are the power channel, and I’m using every connection I can think of!  I’d also like to partner with other local businesswomen and do special events that focus on women taking care of themselves.  So far, most of my clients are women that I know already, but I’m starting to get some response from people I haven’t met.  Right now I have six regular clients; my goal for this year is to have twelve, which doesn’t seem like a lot, but it’ll give me the flexibility I want and need.


Speaking of flexibility, has it been hard juggling coaching on top of being a mom/wife/laundress/chauffeur/personal chef?
It was difficult to find a rhythm at first—I’ve never juggled working with motherhood before. I never want to feel like I’m spreading myself too thin, which has always been a challenge even when I wasn’t working.  So far, it has gone pretty smoothly, though.  The older kids are in school during the week, and Jeff helps on the weekends when I have seminars.  I feel the most conflicted about Henry, because I need to leave him with a babysitter when I’m doing my coaching sessions.  I’ve started having “dates” with him every week, which makes him feel special, and I feel like the quality of those times makes up for the change in quantity. 

In general, I think my family is so happy to see ME so happy that no one has complained yet.  The supreme vote of confidence came a few weeks ago, when [8-year-old daughter] Ellie told me she wanted to be a life coach when she grew up!  I hope, by pursuing my own dreams, that I’ll inspire them to do the same thing and show them it’s okay to take care of yourself too.

Any final advice, as a coach and a “mother of re-invention”?
Listen to your instincts!  As women we tend to crave acknowledgment from everyone around us, but that can be so disappointing and limiting.  Steer clear of instant gratification—the joy is in the journey.  There’s always room to grow, and the possibilities are endless.   I mean, look at me—a year ago this wasn’t even on my horizon.  Now I’m a life coach, an entrepreneur—I never thought I’d be saying that!


Check out Anne’s site:  www.annepillsburycoaching.com

Pre-Flight Info

I used to be fabulous.  When I was in my 20's, I lived in Manhattan with a cute husband, an oversized, underpriced apartment off Central Park West, and notions of working in the fashion industry.  An impulsive cold call (to a fairly famous fashion journalist I saw being interviewed on TV) ended up in a stint as an editorial assistant on a book about the modeling industry, which then led to dream jobs writing for Estee Lauder and Donna Karan.  Fashion shows, parties, makeup, clothes--every patriotic American girl's dream! 

And then came Wyley in the baby carriage. . .followed by Adeline. . .and Phoebe.  Choo's replaced by choo-choo's; Prada by Playdoh; fashion-forward NYC by family-friendly Seattle.  Worth every yummy, sticky, cuddly, scatological, joyful, terrifying second, as any mommy (of the non-Dearest persuasion) will attest to.   And somehow, all of a sudden, 10 years had gone by, and my daughters were watching Project Runway instead of Powerpuff Girls.  They started hanging on to every word of my venerable "Tales from the Olden Days," like the time I saw Tyra Banks take her first walk down the runway, or when I got to interview Isaac Mizrahi for an Oscars fashion report.  Rehashing all that fabulosity made me really miss it--not the celebrity so much, but the CREATIVITY.  I had amazing teachers, experiences, and a huge portfolio of polished publications to show for all my work, and started feeling not only itchy, but ready, to get back to using what I'd learned and what I had in me.

Easy, right?  I mean, how many seasoned fashion copywriters/editors/proofreaders can there be in Seattle?  That is a whole saga in itself, which I will be chronicling here in somewhat-less-than-gory detail.  But really, that's not the main point of this blog.  More than anything, it's a love letter to all the cool women I know who have launched their own second acts.  Women like me: wives and mothers with a need to feed a personal passion or ambition.  Each one of these gals had the boundless bravado, kickass creativity, and unearthly energy to start something totally new.  And though the success of their ventures may not be easily calculated on a monetary level just yet, the fact that they took their visions and turned them into something tangible is a joy to behold.  Not only is it inspirational for me as someone still struggling to get out of the gate,  but it warms my heart, as a life-long "chick cheerleader," to see these women taking off!

Stay tuned for my first profile, coming soon!